Nonsense songs

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, -WARNE AN

C864690

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PUBUC LIBRARY THE BRANCH L BRAR ES

20 WEST 53 STREET
YORK, N.Y. 10013

NONSENSE SONGS.

LESLIE BROOKE'S

CHILDREN'S BOOKS

• • •

ORANGES AND LEMONS
THE MAN IN THE MOON

LITTLE BO-PEEP
THIS LITTLE PIG WENT TO MARKET

ARE ISSUED

AS SEPARATE BOOKS IN PAPER COVERS

OR IN 1\VO VOLUMES IN ART BOARDS

Alto in One Volume

RING O' ROSES

CONTAINING ALL THE ABOVE SELECTIONS

THE THREE LITTLE PIGS

TOM THUMB

THE GOLDEN GOOSE

THE THREE BEARS

ARE ISSUED

AS SEPARATE STORIES IN PAPhR CoVKRS
OR IN TWO VOLUMES IN ART UUAKUS

Also in One Volume

THE GOLDEN GOOSE BOOX

CONTAINING ALL, THE ABOVE STORIES

JOHNNY CROWS GARDEN

JOHNNY CROWS PARTY

THE NURSERY RHYME BOOK

EDITED BY ANDREW LANG

In T~wo I 'olutnts

THE PELICAN CHORUS AND OTHER VERSES

THE ' JUMBLIES ' AND ' OTHER • VERSES

BY EDWARD LEAR

Alsc in One -Volume

NONSENSE SONGS

COMPRISING THE ABOVE TWO SELECTIONS

THE HOUSE IN THE WOOD

THE TAILOR AND THE CROW

t • •

PUBLISHED BY

FREDERICK WARNE & CO., LTD.

NONSENSE SONGS

BY

EDWARD LEAR

AUTHOR OFTHE BOOK OF NONSENSE'

WITH DRAWINGS BY

L.LESLIE BROOKE

* ) * I J O

LONDON

FREDERICK WARNE & CO., LTD,

AND NEW YORK

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PRINTED IN GREAT BRITAIN.

INTRODUCTORY.

T N issuing this new edition of the " Nonsense Songs " the
Publishers desire to say that, feeling Mr. Lear had, con-
trary to his usual custom, presented these songs to the public
illustrated in the slightest manner only, they have, with the
assistance of Mr. L, Leslie Brooke, endeavoured to create a
wider interest in verses which for so many years have given
unwonted pleasure to thousands of readers.

A generation has already passed since these songs were
penned, but their humour is of the kind that does not evaporate
after a few years, and they are as fresh to-day as when first
published. In the " Introduction," written by him for the Ninth
Edition of " Nonsense Songs and Stories," Sir Edward Strachey
asks, " What is Nonsense r " and after declaring that "Nonsense
. . . has shown itself to be a true work of the imagination,
a child of genius, and its writing one of the fine arts," he goes

on to say that —

j

" From the days when Aristotle Investigated the philosophy
of laughter, and Aristoph'aties gave' -laughter its fullest — I might
say its maddest — expr.?ssi^Ti on -the stage at Athens, down to
this week's issue of Pua-c-h', Nonsense has asserted and made
good its claim to a place among the Arts. It has indeed pressed
each of them in turn into its service. Nonsense has found the
highest expression of itself in music, painting, sculpture, and
every form of poetry and prose. The so-called Nonsense Club,
which could count Hogarth and Cowper among its members,

Introductory.

must have been worthy of the name, for so we have the ' March
to Finchley ' and 'John Gilpin ' to testify ; but as far as I know
Edward Lear first openly gave Njnsense its due place and
honour when he called what he wrote pure and absolute
Nonsense, and gave the affix of 'Nonsense' to every kind of
subject; and while we may say, as Johnson did of Goldsmith,
that there was hardly a subject which he did not handle, we
may add with Johnson, that there was none that he did not
adorn by his handling. His pen and pencil vied with each
other in pouring forth new kinds of Nonsense Songs, Nonsense
Stories, Nonsense Alphabets, and Nonsense Botany. The
music to which he set the 'Pelican Chorus' is worthy of the
words to which it is wedded ; and those who remember the
humorous melancholy with which the old man sat down at the
piano to play and sing this song will give his Nonsense Music
a place too."

f WAY OF PREFACE,

IT is believed that all save the youngest readers of these
Nonsense Books will be interested in the two following
autobiographical letters by the author, which have only recently
been published. The first, written over half a century back,
just before one of his journeys in search cf the picturesque,
is a strict recital of date and fact ; the second, composed some
years later, and after he had set up his residence at San Remo,
was written for a young lady of his acquaintance, who had
quoted to him the words of a young lady not of his acquaintance,
which form the refrain cf the verses — " How pleasant to know
Mr. Lear!"

MY DEAR F.,

I want to send you, before leaving" England, a

note or two as to the various publications I have uttered, — bad
and good, and of all sorts, — also their dates, that so you might
be able to screw them into a beautiful memoir of me in case I
leave my bones at Palmyra or elsewhere, Leastwise, if a man
does anything all through life with a deal of bother, and likewise
of some benefit to others, the details of such bother and benefit
may as well be known accurately as the contrary.

By Way of Preface.

Born in 1812 (i2th May), I began to draw, for bread and
cheese, about 1827, but only did uncommon queer shop-sketches
— selling them for prices varying from ninepence to four shillings :
colouring prints, screens, fans ; awhile making morbid disease
drawings, for hospitals and certain doctors of physic. In 1831,
through Mrs. Wentworth, I became employed at the Zoological
Society, and in 1832, published "The Family of the Psittacidae,"
the first complete volume of coloured drawings of birds on so
large a scale published in England, as far as I know — unless
Audubon's were previously engraved. J. Gould's " Indian Pheas-
ants " were commenced at the same time, and after a little while
he employed me to draw many of his birds of Europe, while I
assisted Mrs. Gould in all her drawings of foreground, as may
be seen in a moment by any one who will glance at my drawings
in G.'s European birds and the Toucans. From 1832 to 1836,
when my health failed a good deal, I drew much at che Earl of
Derby's ; and a series of my drawings was published by Dr. Gray
of the British Museum— a book now rare. I also lithographed
many various detached subjects, and a large series of Testudinata
for Mr. (now Professor) Bell ; and I made drawings for Bell's
" British Mammalia," and for two or more volumes of the " Natural-
ist's Library " for the editor, Sir W. Jardine, those volumes being
the Parrot's, and, I think, the Monkeys, and some Cats. In
1835 or '36, being in Ireland and the Lakes, I leaned more and
more to landscape, and when in 1837 it was found that my health
was more affected by the climate month by month, I went abroad,
wintering in Rome till 1841, when I came to England and published
a volume of lithographs called " Rome and its Environs." Return-
ing to Rome, I visited Sicily and much of the South of Italy and
continued to make chalk drawings, though in 1840 I had painttd
my two first oil-paintings. I also gave lessons in drawing at
Rome, and was able to make a very comfortable living. In 1845
I came again to England, and in 1846 gave Queen Victoria some
lessons, through Her Majesty's having seen a work I published
in that year on the Abruzzi, and another on the Roman States In

By Way of Preface,

1847 I went through all Southern Calabria, and went again round
Sicily, and in 1848 left Rome entirely. I travelled then to Malta,
Greece, Constantinople, and the Ionian Islands; and to Mount
Sinai and Greece a second time in 1849, returning to England in
that year. All 1850 I gave up to improving myself in figure-
drawing, and I continued to paint oil-paintings till 1853, having
published in the meantime, in 1849 and 1852, two volumes entitled
"Journals of a Landscape Painter," in Albania and Calabria.
The first edition of the Book of Nonsense was published in 1846,
lithographed by tracing-paper. In 1854 I went to Egypt and
Switzerland, and in 1855 to Corfu, where I remained the winters
of 1856-57-58, visiting Athos, and, later, Jerusalem and Syria. In
the autumn of 1858 I returned to England, and '59 and '60 winters
were passed in Rome. 1861, I remained all the winter in England,
and painted the Cedars of Lebanon and Masada, going after my
sister's death in March, 1861, to Italy. The two following winters

'62 and '63 — were passed at Corfu, and in the end of the latter

year I published " Views of the Ionian Islands." In 1862 a second
edition of the " Book of Nonsense," much enlarged, was published,
and is now in its sixteenth thousand.

O bother !

Yours affectionately,

EDWARD LEAR.

"How pleasant to know Mr. Lear!"
Who has written such volumes of stuff !

Some think him ill-tempered and queer,
But a few think him pleasant enough.

His mind is concrete and fastidious,

His nose is remarkably big ;
His visage is more or less hideous,

His beard it resembles a wig.

By Way of Preface.

He has ears, and two eyes, and ten fingers,
Leastways if you reckon two thumbs ;

Long ago he was one of the singers,
But now he is one of the dumbs.

He sits in a beautiful parlour,

With hundreds of books on the wall ;

He drinks a great deal of Marsala,
But never gets tipsy at all.

He has many friends, laymen and clerical ;

Old Foss is the name of his cat ;
His body is perfectly spherical,

He weareth a runcible hat.

When he walks in a waterproof white,
The children run after him so !

Calling out, " He's coming out in his night-
gown, that crazy old Englishman, oh ! "

He weeps by the side of the ocean,
He weeps on the top of the hill ;

He purchases pancakes and lotion,
And chocolate shrimps from the mill.

He reads but he cannot speak Spanish,

He cannot abide ginger-beer :
Ere the days of his pilgrimage vanish,

How pleasant to know Mr. Lear .'

CONTENTS.

THE JUMBLIES.

THE OWL AND THE PUSSY-CAT.

THE BROOM, THE SHOVEL, THE POKER AND THE
TONGS.

THE DUCK AND THE KANGAROO.
THE CUMMERBUND.

THE DONG WITH A LUMINOUS NOSE.
THE NEW VESTMENTS.
CALICO PIE.

THE COURTSHIP OF THE YONGHY-BONGHY-BO.
INCIDENTS IN THE LIFE OF MY UNCLE ARLY.
THE PELICAN CHORUS.

THE DADDY LONG-LEGS AND THE FLY.
THE NUTCRACKERS AND THE SUGAR-TONGS.
MR. AND MRS. SPIKKY SPARROW.
THE TABLE AND THE CHAIR.
THE TWO OLD BACHELORS.
THE POBBLE WHO HAS NO TOES.
MR. AND MRS. DISCOBBOLOS.
THE QUANGLE WANGLE'S HAT.

The
Jumblies

THE JUMBLIES.

THEY went to sea in a Sieve, they did,
In a Sieve they went to sea :
In spite of all their friends could say,
On a winter's morn, on a stormy day,

In a Sieve they went to sea !
And when the Sieve turned round and round,
And everyone cried, "You'll all be drowned 1"
They cried aloud, " Our Sieve ain't big,
But we don't care a button, we don't care a fig
In a Sieve we'll go to sea I "

The J limb lies.

Far and few, far and few,

Are the lands where the Jumblies live ;
Their heads are green, and their hands are blue.

And they went to sea in a Sieve.

II.

»

They sailed away in a Sieve, they did,

In a Sieve they sailed so fast,
With only a beautiful pea-green veil
Tied with a riband, by way of a sail,

To a small tobacco-pipe mast ;
And every one said, who saw them go,
"O won't they be soon upset, you know!
For the sky is dark, and the voyage is long,
And happen what may, it's extremely wrong
In a Sieve to sail so fasti"
Far and few, far and few,

Are the lands where the Jumblies live;
Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,
And they went to sea in a Sieve.

in.

The water it soon came in, it did,

The water it soon came in;
So to keep them dry, they wrapped their feet
In a pinky paper all folded neat,

The J mnb lies.

And they fastened it down with a pin.
And they passed the night in a crockery-jar,
And each of them said, "How wise we are!
Though the sky be dark, and the voyage be long,
Yet we never can think we were rash or wrono-

o*

While round in our Sieve we spin ! "
Far and few, far and few,

Are the lands where the Jumblies live;
Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,

And they went to sea in a Sieve.

iv.

And ail night long they sailed away ;

And when the sun went down,
They whistled and warbled a moony song
To the echoing sound of a coppery gong,
In the shade of the mountains brown.
" O Timballo ! How happy we are,
When we live in a Sieve and a crockery-jar,
And all night long in the moonlight pale,
We sail away with a pea-green sail,
In the shade of the mountains brown!"
Far and few, far and few,

Are the lands where the Jumblies live;
Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,
And they went to sea in a Sieve.

1 he Jumblies.

V.

They sailed to the Western sea, they did,
To a land all covered with trees,

The Jumblies.

And they bought an Owl, and a useful Cart,
And a pound of Rice, and a Cranberry Tart,

And a hive of silvery Bees.

And they bought a Pig, and some green Jack-daws,
And a lovely Monkey with lollipop paws,
And forty bottles of Ring-Bo-Ree,
And no end of Stilton Cheese.
Far and few, far and few,
Are the lands where the Jumblies live;

Tkc Jumblies.

I heir heads are green, and their hancis are blue,
And they went to sea in a Sieve.

VI.

And in twenty years they all came back,

In twenty years or more,
And every one said, " How tall they've grown !
For they've been to the Lakes, and the Terrible Zone,

And the hills of the Chankly Bore ; "
And they drank their health, and gave them a feast
Of dumplings made of beautiful yeast ;
And every one said, " If we only live,
We too will go to sea in a Sieve-
To the hills of the Chankly Bore ! "
Far and few, far and few,

Are the hinds v/here the Jumblies live;
Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,
And they went to sea in a Sieve

The Owl and
the Fussy- Cat

THE OWL AND THE PUSSY-CAT.

i,

n^HE Owl and the Pussy-Cat went to sea
In a beautiful pea-green boat,
They took some honey, and plenty of money,
Wrapped up in a five-pound note.
The Owl looked up to the stars above,

And sang to a small guitar,
"O lovely Pussy! O Pussy, my love,
What a beautiful Pussy you are,
You are,
You are!
What a beautiful Pussy you are 1 "

II.

Pussy said to the Owl, " You elegant fowl 1

How charmingly sweet you sing !
O let us be married ! too long we have tarried :

But what shall we do for a ring ? "

The Owl and the Pussy-cat.

They sailed away for a year and a day,

To the land where the Bong-tree grows,
And there in a wood a Piggy-wig stood,
With a ring at the end of his nose.
His nose,
His nose,
With a ring at the end of his nose.

The Oil' I and the Pussy-cat.

III.

' Dear Pig, are you willing to sell for one shilling

Your ring?" Said the Piggy, "I will."
So they took it away, and were married next day

By the Turkey who lives on the hill.
They dined on mince, and slices of quince,

Which they ate with a runcible spoon ;
And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand,

They danced by the light of the moon,
The moon,
The moon,

They danced by the light of the moon.

The Broom, the
Shovel ,the Poker

THE BROOM, THE SHOVEL, THE
POKER AND THE TONGS,

i.

THE Broom and the Shovel, the Poker and Tongs,
They all took a drive in the Park,
And they each sang a song, Ding-a-dongl

Ding-a-dong!

Before they went back in the dark.
Mr. Poker he sat quite upright in the coach,

Mr. Tongs made a clatter and clash,
Miss Shovel was dressed all in black (with a brooch),
Mrs. Broom was in blue (with a sash).
Ding-a-dong ! Ding-a-dong !
And they all sang a song!

II.

'O Shovely so lovely!" the Poker he sang,
' You have perfectly conquered my heart I
'Ding-a-dong! Ding-a-dong! If you're pleased with
my song

The Broom, the S/wvcl, the Poker and flic Jongs,

" I will feed you with cold apple tart !
' When you scrape up the coals with a delicate sound,

" You enrapture my life with delight !
"Your nose is so shiny! your head is so round!
" And your shape is so slender and bright !
" Ding-a-dong ! Ding-a-dong !
"Ain't you pleased with my song?"

III.

" Alas ! Mrs. Broom ! " sighed the Tongs in his song,

" O is it because I'm so thin,
"And my legs are so long — Ding-a-dong! Ding-a-
dong !

"That you don't care about me a pin?
"Ah! fairest of creatures, when sweeping the room,

"Ah! why don't you heed my complaint?
" Must you needs be so cruel, you beautiful Broom,
" Because you are covered with paint ?
" Ding-a-dong ! Ding-a-dong !
"You are certainly wrong!"

IV.

Mrs. Broom and Miss Shovel together they sang,
" What nonsense you're singing to-day ! "

Said the Shovel, "I'll certainly hit you a bang!"
Said the Broom, "And I'll sweep you away!"

The Broom, the Shovel, the Poker and the Tongs.

So the Coachman drove homeward as fast as he could,

Perceiving their anger with pain ;
But they put on the kettle, and little by little
They all became happy again.

Ding-a-dong! Ding-a-dong!
There's an end of my song!

The Duck and
the Kangaroo

D

THE DUCK AND THE KANGAROO.

i.

5^ AID the Duck to the Kangaroo,
"Good gracious! how you hop!
Over the fields and the water too,
As if you never would stop !
My life is a bore in this nasty pond,
And I long to go out in the world beyond !

The Duck and the Kangaroo.

o

I wish 1 could hop like you ! '"
Said the Duck to the Kangaroo.

The Duck and the Kangaroo.

II.

" Please give me a ride on your back ! ':

Said the Duck to the Kangaroo.
" I would sit quite still, and say nothing but ' Quack,'

The whole of the long day through !
And we'd go to the Dee, and the Jelly Bo Lee,
Over the land, and over the sea;-

Please take me a ride ! O do ! '

Said the Duck to the Kangaroo.

in.

Said the Kangaroo to the Duck,

"This requires some little reflection;
Perhaps on the whole it might bring me kick,

And there seems but one objection,
Which is, if you'll let me speak so bold,
Your feet are unpleasantly wet and cold,

And would probably give me the roo-

Matiz ! "' said the Kangaroo.

Said the Duck, '* As I sat on the rocks,
1 have though c over that completely,

And I bought four pairs of worsted socks
Which fit my web-feet neatly.

The Duck and the Kangaroo.

And to keep out the cold I've bought a cloak,
And every day a cigar I'll smoke,

All to follow my own dear true

Love of a Kangaroo!"

The Duck and the Kangaroo.
V.

Said the Kangaroo, "I'm ready !

All in the moonlight pale ;
But to balance me well, dear Duck, sit steady !

And quite at the end of my tail 1 "
So away they went with a hop and a bound,
And they hopped the whole world three times round ;

And who so happy,— O who,

As the Duck and the Kangaroo ?

The

Cummerbund

THE CUMMERBUND.

AN INDIAN POEM.

SHE sat upon her Dobie,1
To watch the Evening Star,
And all the Punkahs2 as they passed
Cried, " My I how fair you are ! "
Around her bower, with quivering leaves,
The tall Kamsamahs3 grew,

Washerman.

•Fan.

The Cummerbund.

And Kitmutgars1 in wild festoons l Waiter at table.

Hung down from Tchokis2 blue. -Police or post station.

II.

Below her home the river rolled

With soft meloobious sound,
Where golden-finned Chuprassies3 swam,

In myriads circling round. 3 > office messenger.

Above, on tallest trees remote,

Green Ayahs perched alone,
And all night long the Mussak4 moaned ni'ate,-

Its melancholy tone.

And where the purple Nullahs"' threw

Their branches far and wide,
And silvery Goreewallahs6 flew

In silence, side by side,
The little Bheesties' 7 twittering cry

Rose on the fragrant air,
And oft the angry Jampan8 howled

Deep in his hateful lair.

IV.

She sat upon her Dobie,—
She heard the Nimmak9 hum, —

When all at once a cry arose:
"The Cummerbund10 is cornel'3

Watercourse.

6 Groom.

Water-carrier

*Sedan CJiair.

10 Waist sash.

i' Cummerbund.

In vain she fled ; — with open jaws
The angry monster followed,

And so (before assistance came),
That Lady Fair was swallowed,

v.
They sought in vain for even a bone

Respectfully to bury;
They said, "Hers was a dreadful fatel"

(And Echo answered, " Very.")
They nailed her Dobie to the wall,

Where last her form was seen,
And underneath they wrote these words.

In yellow, blue, and green :-
" Beware, ye Fair ! Ye Fair, beware !

Nor sit out late at night,
Lest horrid Cummerbunds should come,

And swallow you outright/'

NOTE. — First published in the Times of India, Bombay, July, 1874,

Dongf

Luminous

THE DONG WITH A LUMINOUS NOSE.

WHEN awful darkness and silence reign
Over the great Gromboolian plain,

Through the long, long wintry nights ; —
When the angry breakers roar,
As they beat on the rocky shore ;-

When Storm-clouds brood on the towering

heights
Of the Hills on the Chankly Bore:—

Then, through the vast and gloomy dark.
There moves what seems a fiery spark:

A lonely spark with silvery rays

Piercing the coal-black night, -

A meteor strange and bright: —

Tlie Done with a Luminous Nose.

o

Hither and thither the vision strays,
A single lurid light.

Slowly it wanders,— pauses,— creeps,-

Anon it sparkles, — flashes and leaps;
And ever as onward it gleaming goes
A light on the Bong-tree stems it throws.
And those who watch at that midnight hour
From Hall or Terrace, or lofty Tower,
Cry, as the wild light passes along,-
"The Dong!— the Dong!

"The wandering Dong through the forest goes I
"The Dong! the Dong!

" The Dong with a luminous Nose ! "

Long years ago

The Dong was happy and gay,
Till he fell in love with a Jumbly Girl

Who came to those shores one day.
For the Jumblies came in a Sieve, they did, —
Landing at eve near the Zemmery Fidd
Where the Oblong Oysters grow,

And the rocks are smooth and gray.
And all the woods and the valleys rang
With the Chorus they daily and nightly sang, —

The Dong with a Luminous Nose.

" Far and /civ, far and f civ,

Are the lands where the Jumblies live ;
Their heads are green, and their /lands are

And they went to sea in a Sieve"

Happily, happily passed those days!

While the cheerful Jumblies staid;
They danced in circlets all night long,
To the plaintive pipe of the lively Dong,

In moonlight, shine, or shade,
For day and night he was always there
By the side of the Jumbly Girl so fair,
With her sky-blue hands, and her sea-green hair.

The Dong with a Luminous Nose.

Till the morning came of that hateful day

When the Jumblies sailed in their Sieve away,

And the Dong was left on the cruel shore

Gazing— gazing for evermore,-

Ever keeping his weary eyes on

That pea-green sail on the far horizon, —

Singing the Jumbly Chorus still

As he sat all day on the grassy hill, —

" Far and few, far and few,

Are the lands where the Jumblies live ;

Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,
And they went to sea in a Sieve"

The Dono with a Luminous Nose.

But when the sun was low in the West,
The Dong arose and said,-
" What little sense I once possessed
Has quite gone out of my head 1 "

The Dong witJi a Luminous Nose.

And since that day he wanders still
By lake and forest, marsh and hill,
Singing — " O somewhere, in valley or plain
'•Might I find my Jumbly Girl again I
"For ever I'll seek by lake and shore
'Till I find my Jumbly Girl once more I "

Playing a pipe with silvery squeaks,
Since then his Jumbly Girl he seeks,
And because by night he could not see,
He gathered the bark of the Twangum Tree
On the flowery plain that grows.
And he wove him a wondrous Nose, —
A Nose as strange as a Nose could be!
Of vast proportions and painted red,
And tied with cords to the back of his head.

-In a hollow rounded space it ended
With a luminous lamp within suspended,
All fenced about
With a bandage stout
To prevent the wind from blowing

it out ;-

And with holes all round to send the light,
In gleaming rays on the dismal night.

And now each night, and all night long,
Over those plains still roams the Dong!

The Dong with a Luminous Nose.

And above the wail of the Chimp and Snipe
You may hear the squeak of his plaintive pipe,
While ever he seeks, but seeks in vain,
To meet with his Jumbly Girl again;
Lonely and wild— all night he goes,-
The Dong with a luminous Nose!
And all who watch at the midnight houi,
From Hall or Terrace, or Lofty Tower,
Cry, as they trace the Meteor bright,
Moving along through the dreary night,-

"This is the hour when forth he goes,

"The Dong with a luminous Nose!

" Yonder— over the plain he goes ;
" He goes ;
" He goes !

*'The Dong with a luminous Nose!"

lu

The New
Vestments

THE NEW VESTMENTS.

THERE lived an old man in the Kingdom of less,
Who invented a purely original dress ;
And when it was perfectly made and complete,
He opened the door, and walked into the street.

By way of a hat he'd a loaf of Brown Bread,
In the middle of which he inserted his head ;-
His Shirt was made up of no end of dead Mice,
The warmth of whose skins was quite fluffy and nice ;-
His Drawers were of Rabbit-skins ; — so were his Shoes ;-
His Stockings were skins, — but it is not known whose ;-
His Waistcoat and Tro \vsers were made of Pork Chops ;-
His Buttons were Jujubes and Chocolate Drops ;-
His Coat was all Pancakes, with Jam for a border,
And a girdle of Biscuits to keep it in order ;
And he wore over all, as a screen from bad weather,
A Cloak of green Cabbage-leaves stitched all together.

He had walked a short way, when he heard a great noise,
Of all sorts of Beasticles. Hirdlings. and Boys ;-

The New Vestments.

And from every long street and dark lane in the town
Beasts, Birdies, and Boys in a tumult rushed down.
Two Cows and a Calf ate his Cabbage- leaf Cloak ;-
Four Apes seized his Girdle, which vanished like smoke ;-

The New Vestments.

Three Kids ate up half of his Pancaky Coat,-
And the tails were devoured by an ancient He Goat ;—
An army of Dogs in a twinkling tore ///> his
Pork Waistcoat and Trowsers to give to their Puppies ;-
And while they were growling, and mumbling the Chops,
Ten Boys prigged the Jujubes and Chocolate Drops.
He tried to run back to his house, but in vain,
For scores of fat Pigs came again and again ;-
They rushed out of stables and hovels and doors,-
They tore off his Stockings, his Shoes, and his Drawers.
And now from the housetops with screechings descend,
Striped, spotted, white, black, and grey Cats without end ;
They jumped on his shoulders and knocked off his Hat-
When Crows, Ducks and Hens made a mincemeat of

that •-

They speedily flew at his sieeves in a trice,
And utterly tore up his Shirt of dead Mice ;-
They swallowed the last of his Shirt with a squall, —
Whereon he ran home with no clothes on at all.

And he said to himself as he bolted the door,

" I will not wear a similar dress any more,

" Any more, any more, any more, never more ! "

Calico

CALICO PIE.

i.

CALICO Pie,
The Little Birds fly

Down to the calico tree,
Their wings were blue,
And fhey sang " Tilly-loo 1 "
Till away they flew, —
And they never came back to mel
They never came back!

Calico Pic

They never came back !
They never came back to me

II.

Calico Jam,
The little Fish swam
Over the syllabub sea,
He took off his hat,
To the Sole and the Sprat,
And the Willeby-wat,-
But he never came back to me!
He never came back !
He never came back!
He never came back to me!

m.

Calico Ban,
The little Mice ran,
To be ready in time for tea,
Flippity flup,
They drank it all up,
And danced in the cup,-

But they never came back to me !
They never came back !
They never came back!
They never came back to me \

G

Calico Pie.
IV.

Canco Drum,
The Grasshoppers come,
The Butterfly, Beetle, and Bee,
Over the ground,
Around and around,
With a hop and a bound -
But they never came back !
They never came back !
They never came back !
They never came back to me!

it niiiitMiii\<n<i«(«(i

The Courtship
of theYongliy-
Bong'liy-Bo

THE YONGHY-BONGHY-B6.

CANTO.

PIANO.

On the coast of Co - m . inan-del, Where the ear - ly Bumpkins grow, In the

r £ £• • ~t~ >^~? "^ ""^ "^

miUule of t.ie \vu '(Is, Livedthe Yonghy Bonghy B6; Two old chairs and half a candle, O.,e o.d

—

- - -—

Hi zli ^= i

jug with-out a hau-dle ; These were all his worldly goods, In the inii'ule of the wood*, These w- ro

fig ^ IP =}

-*- "^ ' -•— " -o

all the wurkl ly goods, Of the YoLg-hv Bong-Ly BO, Of the Yocg-l.y Bong hy Bo.

THE COURTSHIP OF THE YONGHY-

BONGHY-BO.

i.

ON the Coast of Coromandel,
Where the early pumpkins grow,

In the middle of the woods
Lived the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.
Two old chairs, and half a candle,-
One old jug without a handle,-

These were all his worldly goods:
In the middle of the woods,
These were all the worldly goods
Of the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo,
Of the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.

n.

Once, among the Bong-trees walking
Where the early pumpkins grow,

To a little heap of stones
Came the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.
There he heard a Lady talking,
To some milk-white Hens of Dorking,—
" Tis the Lady Jingly Jones 1

77/6- Courtship of the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.

•' On that little heap of stones
" Sits the Lady Jingly Jones ! '

Said the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo,

Said the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.

ill.

•' Lady Jingly! Lady Jingly!
"Sitting where the pumpkins grow,

"Will you come and be my wife?"
Said the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.
" I am tired of living singly,-
" On this coast so wild and shingly,-
" I'm a-weary of my life;
" If you'll come and be my wife,
" Quite serene would be my life ! " —
Said the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo,
Said the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.

IV.

' On this Coast of Coromandel,
" Shrimps and watercresses grow,

" Prawns are plentiful and cheap."
Said the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.
" You shall have my chairs and candle,
" And my jug without a handle !-
1 Gaze upon the rolling deep
(" Fish is plentiful and cheap)-
" As the sea, my love is deep ! '

The Courtship of the J Tonghy-Bonghy-Bo.

Said the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo,
Said the Yonghy-Bonghy-BO.

v.

Lady Jingly answered sadly,
And her tears began to flow,-

"Your proposal comes too late,
" Mr. Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo !
"I would be your wife most gladly!'
(Here she twirled her fingers madly)

Tk: Courtship of the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bb.

" But in England I've a mate 1
"Yes! you've asked me far too late,
" For in England I've a mate,

" Mr. Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo !

" Mr. Yonghy-Bonghy-BO !

VI.

"Mr. Jones— (his name is Handel, -
" Handel Jones, Esquire, & Co.)

"Dorking fowls delights to send,
"Mr. Yonghy-Bonghy-BO !
' Keep, oh ! keep your chairs and candle,
" And your jug without a handle,-
" I can merely be your friend !

-Should my Jones more Dorkings send,
" I will give you three, my friend !
" Mr. Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo !
" Mr. Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo !

VII.

"Though you've such a tiny body,
"And your head so large doth grow, —
"Though your hat may blow away,
" Mr. Yonghy-Bonghy-BO !
"Though you're such a Boddy Doddy-
"Yet I wish that I could modi-

"fy the words 1 needs must say!
"Will you please to go away?

Tlie Courtship of the Yonghy-Bonghy-B6.

" That is all I have to say-
Mr. Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo,
Mr. Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo ! "

VIII.

Down the slippery slopes of Myrtle,
Where the early pumpkins grow,

To the calm and silent sea
Fled the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.
Tnere beyond the Bay of Gurtle,
Lay a large and lively Turtle ;-

"You're the Cove," he said, "for me;
"On your back beyond the sea,
"Turtle, you shall carry me!"

H

7 he Court ship of the Yonghy-Bonghy-136

Said the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.
Said the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.

IX.

Through the silent-roaring ocean
Did the Turtle swiftly go ;

Holding fast upon his shell
Rode the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo,
With a sad primaeval motion
Towards the sunset isles of Boshen
Still the Turtle bore him well,
Holding fast upon his shell.
" Lady Jingly Jones, farewell ! ''
Sang the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo,
Sang the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.

x.

From the Coast of Coromandel
Did that Lady never go ;

On that heap of stones she mourns
For the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.
On that Coast of Coromandel,
In his jug without a handle,

Still she weeps, and daily moans;
On that little heap of stones
To her Dorking Hens she moans
For the Yonghy-Bonghy-BO,
F^r the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.

Incidents in
the Life of my
Uncle Arly

INCIDENTS IN THE LIFE OF MY
UNCLE ARLY.

i.

OMY AGED UNCLE ARLY1
Sitting on a heap of Barley

Thro' the silent hours of night,-
Close beside a leafy thicket :-
On his nose there was a Cricket--
In his hat a Railway-Ticket

(But his shoes were far too tight).

II.

Long ago, in youth, he squander'd
All his goods away, and wander'd

To the Tiniskoop-hills afar.
There on golden sunsets blazing,
Every evening found him gazing,—
Singing,—" Orb ! you're quite amazing !

" How I wonder what you are I "

Incidents in the Life of my Uncle Arly.

III.

Like the ancient Medes and Persians,
Always by his own exertions

Incidents in the Life of my Uncle Arly

He subsisted on those hills ;-
Whiles,— by teaching children spelling,-
Or at times by merely yelling, -
Or at intervals by selling

" Propter's Nicodemus Pills."

IV.

Later, in his morning rambles

He perceived the moving brambles -

Something square and white disclose ;-
Twas a First-class Railway-Ticket ;
But, on stooping down to pick it
Off the ground,— a pea-green Cricket

Settled on my uncle's Nose.

v.

Never — never more,— oh! never,
Did that Cricket leave him even-
Dawn or evening, day or night;—
Clinging as a constant treasure,-
Chirping with a cheerious measure,-
Wholly to my uncle's pleasure

(Though his shoes were far too tight).

VI.

So for three and forty winters,

Till his shoes were worn to splinters,

Incidents in tlic Life of my Uncle Arly.

All those hills he wander'd o'er,-
Sometimes silent ;— sometimes yelling ;—
Till he came to Borley-Melling,

Incidents in the Life of my Uncle Arly.

Near his old ancestral dwelling

(But his shoes were far too tight).

VII.

On a little heap of Barley
Died my aged Uncle Arly,

And they buried him one night ;—
Close beside the leafy thicket ;-
There,— his hat and Railway-Ticket ;-
There,— his ever-faithful Cricket

(But his shoes were far too tight).

The Pelican
Chorus

THE PELICANS.

CANTO.

PIAVO.

-A — f--— m — ,

-3=^

tJ

King and Queen of the Peli - cans we, No other birds so grand we see!

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f — f — *-

= — ^ — — — -- — ,

-=1--

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b.it we have feet l.ke flu->, With love - ly lea- the -ry throats aud chins.

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*= ^-f*-r^i
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COIO—piil SOStfKUlO.

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Ploff - skin, Pl'iff - skin, Pe - li - can Jea ! \\ e think no binis so hap-py as we!

?=j=±=j£

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Plump -skin, 1'loff - skin, Pe - li • can Jill! We think so then, and we thought so still!

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NOTE. — The air of this Song by Edward Lear ; the arrangement for the piano by
Professor Poine, of San Remo, Italy.

THE PELICAN CHORUS.

KING and Queen of the Pelicans we;
No other Birds so grand we see!
None but we have feet like fins !
With lovely leathery throats and chins!
Ploffskin, Pluffskin, Pelican jee!
We think no birds so happy as we!
Plumpskin, Ploshkin, Pelican Jill !
We think so then, and we thought so still !

We live on the Nile. The Nile we love.
By night we sleep on the cliffs above.

The Pelican Chorus.

By day we fish, and at eve we stand
On long bare islands of yellow sand.
And when the sun sinks slowly down
And the great rock walls grow dark and brown,
Where the purple river rolls fast and dim
And the ivory Ibis starlike skim,
Wing to wing we dance around,-
Stamping our feet with a flumpy sound, —
Opening our mouths as Pelicans ought,
And this is the song we nightly snort :
Ploffskin, Pluffskin, Pelican jee,-
We think no Birds so happy as we !
Plumpskin, Ploshkin, Pelican jill,-
We think so then, and we thought so still.

Last year came out our Daughter, Dell ;
And all the Birds received her well.
To do her honour, a feast we made
For every bird that can swim or wade.
Herons and Gulls, and Cormorants black,
Cranes, and Flamingoes with scarlet back,
Plovers and Storks, and Geese in clouds,
Swans and Dilberry Ducks in crowds.
Thousands of Birds in wondrous flight !
They ate and drank and danced all night,
And echoing back from the rocks you heard
Multitude-echoes from Bird and Bird, —

The Pelican Chorus.

Ploffskin, Pluffskin, Pelican jee,

We think no Birds so happy as we 1

Plumpskin, Ploshkin, Pelican jill,

We think so then, and we thought so still

Yes, they came ; and among the rest,

The King of the Cranes all grandly dressed.

The Pelican Chorus.

Such a lovely tail ! Its feathers float

Between the ends of his blue dress-coac;

With pea-green trousers all so neat,

And a delicate frill to hide his feet,-

(For though no one speaks of it, every one knows

He has got no webs between his toes ! )

As soon as he saw our Daughter Dell,

In violent love that Crane King fell,—

On seeing her waddling form so fair,

With a wreath of shrimps in her short white hair,

And before the end of the next long day,

Our Dell had given her heart away;

For the King of the Cranes had won that heart,

With a Crocodile's egg and a large fish-tart.

She vowed to marry the King of the Cranes,

Leaving the Nile for stranger plains ;

And away they flew in a gathering crowd

Of endless birds in a lengthening cloud.
Ploffskin, Pluffskin, Pelican jee,
We think no Birds so happy as we!
Plumpskin, Ploshkin, Pelican jill,
We think so then, and we thought so still !

And far away in the twilight sky,

We heard them singing a lessening cry, —

The Pelican Chorus.

Farther and farther till out of sight,

And we stood alone in the silent night !

Often since, in the nights of June,

We sit on the sand and watch the moon;-

She has gone to the great Gromboolian plain,

And we probably never shall meet again 1

The Pelican Chorus.

Oft, in the long still nights of June,

We sit on the rocks and watch the moon ;—

-She dwells by the streams of the Chankly Bore,
And we probably never shall see her more.
Ploffskin, Pluffskin, Pelican jee,
We think no Birds so happy as we !
Plumpskin, Ploshkin, Pelican jill,
We think so then, and we thought so still!

The Daddy
Long- Legs and
the

THE DADDY LONG-LEGS AND THE FLY,

ONCE Mr. Daddy Long-legs,
Dressed in brown and gray,
Walked about upon the sands
Upon a summer's day;
And there among the pebbles,

When the wind was rather cold,
He met with Mr. Floppy Fly,

All dressed in blue and gold.
And as it was too soon to dine,
They drank some Periwinkle-wine,
And played an hour or two, or more,
At battlecock and shuttledore.

The Daddy Long-Legs and the Fiy.

II.

Said Mr. Daddy Long-legs

To Mr. Floppy Fly.,
" Why do you never come to court ?

I wish you'd tell me why.
All gold and shine, in dress so fine,

You'd quite delight the court.
Why do you never go at all ?

I really think you ought!
And if you went, you'd see such sights!
Such rugs! and jugs! and candle-lights!
And more than all, the King and Queen
One in red, and one in green ! "

in.

" O Mr. Daddy Long-legs,"

Said Mr. Floppy Fly,
"It's true I never go to court,

And I will tell you why.
If I had six long legs like yours,

At once I'd go to court!
But oh! I can't, because my legs

Are so extremely short.
And I'm afraid the King and Queen
(One in red, and one in green)
Would say aloud, ' You are not fit,
You Fly, to come to court a bit ! ' "

The Daddy Long- Legs and the Fly,

IV.

"O Mr. Daddy Long-legs,"

Said Mr. Floppy Fly,
" I wish you'd sing one little song 1

One mumbian melody!
You used to sing so awful well

In former days gone by,
But now you never sing at all ;

I wish you'd tell me why :
For if you would, the silvery sound
Would please the shrimps and cockles round,
And all the crabs would gladly come
To hear you sing, ' Ah, Hum di Hum 1 '

V.

Said Mr. Daddy Long-legs,

"I can never sing again!
And if you wish, I'll tell you why,

Although it gives me pain.
For years I could not hum a bit,

Or sing the smallest song;
And this the dreadful reason is,

My legs are grown too long!
My six long legs, all here and there,
Oppress my bosom with despair ;
And if I stand, or lie, or sit,
I cannot sing one single bit ! "

The Daddy Long Legs and the Fly,

VI.

So Mr. Daddy Long-legs

And Mr. Floppy Fly
Sat down in silence by the sea,

And gazed upon the sky.

They said, "This is a dreadful thing!

The world has all gone wrong,
Since one has legs too short by half,

The other much too long!
One never more can go to court,
Because his legs have grown too short ;
The other cannot sing a song,
Because his legs have grown too long ! "

The Daddy Long-Legs and the Fly.

VII.

Then Mr. Daddy Long-legs

And Mr. Floppy Fly
Rushed downward to the foaming sea

With one sponge-taneous cry ;

And there they found a little boat,
Whose sails were pink and gray;

And off they sailed among the waves,
Far, and far away.

They sailed across the silent main,

And reached the great Gromboolian plain ;

And there they play for evermore

At battlecock and shuttledore.

The Nutcrackers

tongs

D

THE NUTCRACKERS AND THE SUGAR-
TONGS.

I.

THE Nutcrackers sate by a plate on the table,
The Sugar-tongs sate by a plate at his side;
And the Nutcrackers said, " Don't you wish we

were able

"Along the blue hills and green meadows to ride?
" Must we drag on this stupid existence for ever,

"So idle and weary, so full of remorse, —
"While every one else takes his pleasure, and never
"Seems happy unless he is riding a horse?

I!.

" Don't you think we could ride without being in-
structed ?

"Without any saddle, or bridle, or spur?
Our legs are so long, and so aptly constructed,
" I'm sure that an accident could not occur.

!t

The Nutcrackers and the Sugar-tongs.

'" Let us all of a sudden hop down from the table,
"And hustle downstairs, and each jump on a horse!

" Shall we try ? Shall we go ? Do you think we are

able ? "
The Sugar-tongs answered distinctly, "Of course!"

Ike Nutcrackers and the Sugar-tongs.

Ill

So down the long staircase they hopped in a minute,

The Sugar-tongs snapped, and the Crackers said,

" Crack ! "
The stable was open, the horses were in it ;

Each took out a pony, and jumped on his back.
The Cat in a fright scrambled out of the doorway,

The Mice tumbled out of a bundle of hay,
The brown and white Rats, and the black ones from
Norway,

Screamed out, " They are taking the horses away ! "

IV.

The whole of the household was filled with amazement,

The Cups and the Saucers danced madly about,
The Plates and the Dishes looked out of the casement,

The Saltcellar stood on his head with a shout,
The Spoons with a clatter looked out of the lattice,

The Mustard-pot climbed up the Gooseberry Pies,
The Soup-ladle peeped through a heap of Veal Patties,

And squeaked with a ladle-like scream of surprise.

The Nutcrackers and the Sugar-tongs

O o

V.

The Frying-pan said, " It's an awful delusion 1 "

The Tea-kettle hissed
and grew black in
the face;

And they all rushed
downstairs in the
wildest confusion,

To see the great Nut-
cracker - Sugar- tong
race.

And out of the stable,
with screamings and
laughter,

(Their ponies were
cream -coloured,
speckled with
brown,)

The Nutcrackers first,

*.

and the Sugar-tongs
^^^^ after,

Rode all round the yard, and then all round the
town.

The Nutcracker* and the Sugar-tongs.

VI.

They rode through the street, and they rode by the
station,

They galloped away to the beautiful shore ;
In silence they rode, and " made no observation,"

Save this : " We will never go back anv more 1 "
And still you might hear, till they rode out of hearing,

The Sugar-tongs snap, and the Crackers say "Crack!"
Till far in the distance, their forms disappearing,

They faded away. — And they never came back !

i

. and Mrs.
Spikky Spar row

MR. AND MRS. SPIKKY SPARROW.

ON a little piece of wood,
Mr. Spikky Sparrow stood ;
Mrs. Sparrow sate close by,
A-making of an insect pie,
For her little children five,
In the nest and all alive,
Singing with a cheerful smile
To amuse them all the while,

Twikky wikky wikky we,
Wikky bikky twikky tee,
Spikky bikky bee 1

ll,

Mrs. Spikky Sparrow said,
" Spikky, Darling 1 in my head
"Many thoughts of trouble come*
s< Like to flies upon a plum i

Mr. and J\Irs. Spikky Sparrow.

" All last night, among the trees,
" I heard you cough, I heard you sneeze ;
" And, thought I, it's come to that
"Because he does not wear a hat!

"Chippy wippy sikky tee!

" Bikky wikky tikky mee !
" Spikky chippy we !

ill.

" Not that you are growing old,
" But the nights are growing cold.
"No one stays out all night long
" Without a hat : I'm sure it's wrong ! '
Mr. Spikky said, " How kind,
"Dear! you are, to speak your mind!
" All your life I wish you luck !
"You are! you are! a lovely duck!

"Witchy witchy vvitchy we!

"Twitchy witchy witchy bee!
"Tikky tikky tee!

IV.

" I was also sad, and thinking,
"When one day I saw you winking,
"And I heard you sniffle-snuffle,
" And I saw your feathers ruffle ;

Mr. and Mrs. Spikky Sparrow.

li To myself I sadiy said,
'bhe's neuralgia in her head!
"That dear head has nothing on it!
"Ought she not to wear a bonnet?

"Witchy kitchy kitchy wee!

' Spikky wikky mikky bee I
"Chippy wippy chee!

Mr. and Mrs. Spikky Sparrow.

V.

" Let us both fly up to town !
"There I'll buy you such a gown!
" Which, completely in the fashion,
"You shall tie a sky-blue sash on.
"And a pair of slippers neat,
"To fit your darling little feet,
" So that you will look and feel
" Quite galloobious and genteel !

"Jikky wikky bikky see!

" Chicky bikky wikky bee !
"Twicky witchy wee!"

VI.

So they both to London went,
Alighting on the Monument,
Whence they flew down swiftly— pop,
Into Moses' wholesale shop ;
There they bought a hat and bonnet,
And a gown with spots upon it,
A satin sash of Cloxam blue,
And a pair of slippers too.

Zikky wikky mikky bee!

Witchy witchy mitchy kee!
Sikky tikky wee !

Mr. and Mrs. Spikky Sparrow.

VII.

Then when so completely drest,

Back they flew and reached their nest.

Their children cried, " O Ma and Pa !

" How truly beautiful you are ! "

Said they, "We trust that cold or pain

" We shall never feel again !

" While perched on tree, or house, or steeple,

" We now shall look like other people.

" Witchy witchy witchy wee !

"Twikky mikky bikky bee!
" Zikky sikky tee ! "

Tab

The Chair.

THE TABLE AND THE CHAIR.

i.

SAID the Table to the Chair,
" You can hardly be aware
" How I suffer from the heat,
" And from chilblains on my feet !
" If we took a little walk,
"We might have a little talk!
"Pray let us take the air!"
Said the Table to the Chair.

The Table and the Chair.

II.

Said the Chair unto the Table,
" Now you know we are not able !
" How foolishly you talk,
"When you know we cannot walk!7'
Said the Table with a sigh,
"It can do no harm to try ;
*' I've as many legs as you,
Why can't we walk on two ? "

in.

So they both went slowly down,
And walked about the town
With a cheerful bumpy sound,
As they toddled round and round.
And everybody cried,
As they hastened to their side,
" See ! the Table and the Chair
" Have come out to take the air!'

IV.

But in going down an alley,
To a castle in the valley,
They completely lost their way.
And wandered all the day,
Till, to see them safely back,
They paid a Ducky-quack,

The Table and the Chair.

And a Beetle, and a Mouse,
Who took them to their house.

V.

Then they whispered to each other,
"O delightful little brother!
" What a lovely walk we've taken !
"Let us dine on Beans and Bacon 1"
So the Ducky and the leetle
Browny-Mousy and the Beetle
Dined, and danced upon their heads
Till they toddled to their beds.

TheTwo Old
Bachelors

THE TWO OLD BACHELORS.

TWO old Bachelors were living in one house;
One caught a Muffin, the other caught a

Mouse.

Said he who caught the Muffin to him who
caught the Mouse,-

The Two Old Bachelors.

" This Happens just in time ! For we've nothing in the

house,
" Save a tiny slice of lemon and a teaspoonful of

honey.
"And what to do for dinner — since we haven't any

money ?

" And what can we expect if we haven't any dinner,
' But to lose our teeth and eyelashes and keep on

growing thinner? ':

'Said he who caught the Mouse to him who caught the

Muffin, -
"We might cook this little Mouse, if we only had some

Stuffin' !
'If we had but Sage and Onion we could do extremely

well,
" But how to get that Stuffin' it is difficult to tell ! "—

Those two old Bachelors ran quickly to the town
And asked for Sage and Onion as they wandered up

and down;
They borrowed two large Onions, but no Sage was to

be found
In the Shops, or in the Market, or in all the Gardens

round.

The Tivo Old Bachelors.

But some one said,- "A hill there is, a ILtle to the north,
" And to its purpledicular top a narrow way leads forth ;-
" And there among the rugged rocks abides an ancient

Sage,-
" An earnest Man, who reads all day a most perplexing

: Climb up, and seize him by the toes ! — all studious as

he sits,—
And pull him down, — and chop him into endless little

bits !
Then mix him with your Onion, (cut up likewise into

Scraps,)-
When your Stuffin' will be ready — and very good .

perhaps."

Those two old Bachelors without loss of time

The nearly purpledicular crags at once began to climb :

And at the top, among the rocks, all seated in a

nook,
They saw that Sage a-reading of a most enormous

book.
"You earnest Sage!' aloud they cried, "your book

you've read enough in !-
"We wish to chop you into bits to mix you into

Stuffin' ! "—

The 7u'0 Old Bachelors.

But that old Sage looked calmly up, and with his awful

book,
At those two Bachelors' bald heads a certain aim he

took ; —
And over crag and precipice they rolled promiscuous

down,-

At once they rolled, and never stopped in lane or field
or town, —

And when they reached their house, they found (besides
their want of Stuffin,')

The Two Old Bachelors.

The Mouse had fled; — and, previously, had eaten up
the Muffin.

They left their home in silence by the once convivial

door,
And from that hour those Bachelors were never heard

of more.

The Pobble
who has no
Toes

THE POBBLE WHO HAS NO TOES

i.

THE Pobble who has no toes
Had once as many as we;
When they said, " Some day you may lose

them all ; "

He replied,—" Fish fiddle de-dee ! "
And his Aunt Jobiska made him drink
Lavender water tinged with pink,
For she said, " The World in general knows
There's nothing so good for a Robbie's toes ! "

II.

The Pobble who has no toes
Swam across the Bristol Channel ;

Tlic Pobble who has no 7bcs.

But before he set out he wrapped his nose

In a piece of scarlet flannel.
For his Aunt Jobiska said, " No harm
" Can come to his toes if his nose is warm ;
"And it's perfectly known that a Robbie's toes
" Are safe,— provided he minds his nose."

III.

The Pobble swam fast and well,
And when boats or ships came near him

G

The Pobblc ivho lias no Toes.

He tinkledy-binkledy-winkled a bell,

So that all the world could hear him.
And all the Sailors and Admirals cried,

The Pobble ivho has no Toes.

When they saw him nearing the further side:-
" He has gone to fish, for his Aunt Jobiska's
" Runcible Cat with crimson whiskers ! "

IV.

But before he touched the shore,

The shore of the Bristol Channel,
A sea-green Porpoise carried away

His wrapper of scarlet flannel.
And when he came to observe his feet.
Formerly garnished with toes so neat,
His face at once became forlorn
On perceiving that all his toes were gone!

v.

And nobody ever knew

From that dark day to the present,
Whoso had taken the Robbie's toes,

In a manner so far from pleasant,
Whether the shrimps or crawfish gray,
Or crafty Mermaids stole them away-
Nobody knew ; and nobody knows
Haw the Pobble was robbed of his twice five toes t

VI.

The Pobble who has no toes
Was placed in a friendly Bark,

The Pobblc ivho has no Toes.

And they rowed him back, and carried him up

To his Aunt Jobiska's Park.
And she made him a feast at his earnest wish
Of eggs and buttercups fried with fish ;-
And she said, — " It's a fact the whole world knows,
"That Pobbles are happier without their toes."

.••»••% <• V1' >••

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Mr. and Mrs.
Discobbolos

MR, AND MRS. DISCOBBOLOS.

i.

nR AND MRS. DISCOBBOLOS
Climbed to the top of a wall,
And they sat to watch the sunset sky,
And to hear the Nupiter Piffkin cry
And the Biscuit Buffalo call.
They took up a roll and some Camomile tea,
Anc} both were as happy as happy could be—
Till Mrs. Discobbolos said, —
"Oh! W! X! Y! Z!
" It has just come into my head —
" Suppose we should happen to fall ! ! ! ! !

" Darling Mr. Discobbolos !

Mr. and Mrs. Discobbolos.

II.

"Suppose we should fall down flumpetty

"Just like two pieces of stone!
" On to the thorns,— or into the moat !
"What would become of your new green coat?

" And might you not break a bone ?
"It never occurred to me before-
''That perhaps we shall never go down any more!
And Mrs. Discobbolos said-
" Oh ! W! X ! Y f Z !
" What put it into your head
" To climb up this wall ?— my own

Mr. and Mrs. Discobbolos.

" Darling Mr. Discobbolos ? "

Mr. and Mrs. Discobbolos.

III.

Mr. Discobbolos answered,-

"At first it gave me pain,-
" And I felt my ears turn perfectly pink
"When your exclamation made me think

" We might never get down again !
" But now I believe it is wiser far
"To remain for ever just where we are." —
And Mr. Discobbolos said,
"Oh! W! X! Y! Z!
"It has just come into my head —

" We shall never go down again —

"Dearest Mrs. Discobbolos 1

ry

So, Mr. and Mrs. Discobbolos

Stood up, and began to sing,
" Far away from hurry and strife
" Here we will pass the rest of life,

" Ding a dong, ding dong, ding !
' We want no knives nor forks nor chairs,
' No tables nor carpets nor household cares,.

H

Mr. and Mrs. Discobbolos.

" From worry of life we've fled-
"Oh! W! X! Y! Z!
"There is no more trouble ahead
Sorrow or any such thing-

" For Mr. and Mrs. Discobbolos ! "

TheQuangfle
Wangles Hat.

THE QUANGLE WANGLE'S HAT.

i.

ON the top of the Crumpetty Tree
The Quangle Wangle sat,
But his face you could not see,
On account of his Beaver Hat.
For his Hat was a hundred and two feet wide,
With ribbons and bibbons on every side,
And bells, and buttons, and loops, and lace.
So that nobody ever could see the face
Of the Quangle Wangle Quee,

11.

The Quangle Wangle said

To himself on the Crumpetty Tree, —
" Jam ; and jelly ; and bread ;

"Are the best of food for me!

The Quangle Wangle s Hat.

"But the longer I live on this Crumpetty Tree,
" The plainer than ever it seems to me
"That very few people come this way,
"And that life on the whole is far from gay!"
Said the Quangle Wangle Quee.

in.

But there came to the Crumpetty Tree,

Mr. and Mrs. Canary;
And they said, — " Did ever you see

"Any spot so charmingly airy?
" May we build a nest on your lovely Hat ?
" Mr. Quangle Wangle, grant us that !
" O please let us come and build a nest
"Of whatever material suits you best,
" Mr. Quangle Wangle Quee ! "

IV.

And besides, to the Crumpetty Tree

Came the Stork, the Duck, and the Owl ;
The Snail and the Bumble-Bee,

The Frog and the Fimble Fowl ;
VThe Fimble Fowl, with a Corkscrew leg;)
And all of them said, — "We humbly beg,
" We may build our homes on your lovely Hat,-
" Mr. Quangle Wangle, grant us that!
"Mr. Quangle Wangle Quee!"

7 he OuuHglc Wangle & Hal,

V.

And the Golden Grouse came there,
And the Pobble who has no toes^—

And the small Olympian bear,-
And the Dong with a luminous nose.

And the Blue Baboon, who played the flute, —

And the Orient Calf from the Land of Tute,—

The Ouangle Wangles Hat.

•^ lj C?

And the Attery Squash, and the Bisky Bat,-
All came and built on the lovely Hat
Of the Quangle Wangle Quee.

VI.

And the Quangle Wangle said

To himself on the Crumpetty Tree,-
"When all these creatures move

" What a wonderful noise there'll be ! "
And at night t?y the light of the Mulberry moon
They danced to the Flute of the Blue Baboon,
On the broad green leaves of the Crumpetty Tree,
And all were as happy as happy could be,
With the Quangle Wangle Quee.

CENTRAL CIRCULATION
CHILDREN'S ROOM

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